The I Ching hexagram, ‘Oppression‘, comes to mind:
“… Hard times shrivel our spirits, and give rise to a multitude of “crows” in the form of troublesome worries. Times of great loss or personal failure break weaker people; but the strong of heart can bend with fate …”
Valentine’s Day has a habit of highlighting the Sweet and Sour around us. For every kiss that ‘begins with K’ there’s a lonely heart sitting at home.
No, this isn’t about affairs of the heart … more like it’s about Challenges and Change, and relationships are examples we can understand.
When things go sideways, it doesn’t mean the entire experience was a fail. Not every lesson lasts a lifetime, and it’s important to glean the wisdom we are offered and to honor the opportunity for growth.
Sometimes we resist change because we are afraid of the unknown, sometimes because we fear being seen as ‘quitters’ or failures. My thoughts are that each of us must walk our own paths, listening to our deepest instincts, and everything else is simply people on the outside looking in … opinions and theories. Background noise.
“… Keep in mind that failure – the final taboo in modern society – is but one part of the inevitable cycle of life for those who dare to live fully and completely. Never to fail at all is to fail in the biggest way.”
New experiences, new relationships, even the release from a toxic or dead relationship … Change … are all wonderful reminders of how much Life has to share with us. These ‘re-dos’ can be blessings in disguise. Old patterns and dead-end habits must be purged to make room for growth and fresh starts. We see this in the cycles of Nature, the leaves that fall from trees aren’t ‘garbage’, they also become compost to nurture what will be further growth for the tree.
See? We are the trees, and even our worst mistakes will carry something of value for us.
I was at a Yin Yoga Teacher Training recently and the instructor (the super-duper Corina Benner) read a poem that really stayed with me:
‘She Let Go’
Without a thought or a word, she let go.
She let go of fear.
She let go of judgments.
She let go of the confluence of opinions swarming around her head.
She let go of the committee of indecision within her.
She let go of all the ‘right’ reasons.
Wholly and completely, without hesitation or worry, she just let go.
She didn’t ask anyone for advice.
She didn’t read a book on how to let go.
She just let go.
She let go of all the memories that held her back.
She let go of all of the anxiety that kept her from moving forward.
She let go of the planning and all of the calculations about how to do
it just right.
She didn’t promise to let go.
She didn’t journal about it.
She didn’t write the projected date in her Day-Timer.
She made no public announcement.
She didn’t check the weather report or read her daily horoscope.
She just let go.
She didn’t analyze whether she should let go.
She didn’t call her friends to discuss the matter.
She didn’t utter one word.
She just let go.
No one was around when it happened. There was no applause or
No one thanked her or praised her. No one noticed a thing.
Like a leaf falling from a tree, she just let go.
There was no effort. There was no struggle.
It wasn’t good. It wasn’t bad.
It was what it was, and it is just that.
In the space of letting go, she let it all be.
A small smile came over her face. A light breeze blew through her.
And the sun and the moon shone forevermore.
Here’s to giving ourselves the gift of letting go…
There’s only one guru ~ you.
The author of this poem is unclear. A few sites list Ernest Holmes as the author, another Jennifer Eckert Bernau, and still another Rev. Safire Rose.